Chris Harrison has decided to make a statement regarding Paradise and I don’t think I can express enough how uninterested I am in this.  If ABC is having Chris step forward, it shows how little they actually care about this story.  I’ll say it once and I’ll say it again, Chris is no Andy Cohen.  Andy is the puppet master and Chris is a puppet. But let’s see what he has to say.

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He starts his useless statement off with “by now, no doubt, you have heard we have suspended production…” Yes, Chris, no doubt about it, any of us who clicked this link to read your statement definitely heard you cancelled the show.  No one saw Bachelor in Paradise and skipped the article, but then saw Chris Harrison and was like “shit, I’ve got to know what’s going on”!  Who wrote this statement for you??

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Then he tells us there is only so much he can say and with how much misinformation is out there, he’s not saying anything until it’s fully resolved….meaning he doesn’t want to be the one to resolve it or, shocker, he knows less than us. Does he not remember confirming this show was based on sex a long time ago?

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He tells us millennials that we need to be patient and we cant get answers whenever we want (tell that to TMZ).  He says he’s real sorry and hopes to get back to work as soon as possible aka he wants to get his tan on and mock these fools just as much as me do.

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Thanks for nothing, Christopher.  This was a waste of my time.

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