Breaking News Kardashians

Return of The Kim

Just when we feel that 2016 is going to end with a short list of positives and a long, excruciating list of negatives, we are gifted with what we have been needing for so long now.  I know I am not alone when I say how happy and relieved I am that Kimberly Kardashian West has surfaced.

Hallelujah.  Two months after being robbed at gun point and then only days after her husband has been released from the hospital after a mental breakdown, Kim has shown her face to the world again.  She isn’t at an event or out shopping, but in Love Magazine’s day 12 of their advent calendar.  I’ll take what I can get people.

I seriously thought about pulling my hair out these last few months, working through the mess Kim has left us in.  First, Keeping Up With the Kardashians stopped filming.  I know 99% of the time we know what is happening, but honestly I need my fix.  It’s my drug of choice.

First, Kylie got it into her head that she could take over the throne of the most beloved Kardashian/Jenner and when even more insane on Snap Chat than before.  I’d really have loved to be in the room when they told Kylie she had to pull back on social media since her sister was HELD AT GUN POINT, and Kylie, being the brat she is, walked out and bought a new lambo.  Between her forty dogs she’s allowing to inbreed and her awful online pop up shop, I can barely watch her snap chats anymore.  She wants to be Kim, but she will never be Kim.
But I do because, duh, I need to know when the Kylie Lip Kit sales are happening. I can say nothing bad about Kylie Cosmetics except that she didn’t spell cosmetics with a K.

Second, there is Kendall who gave us life in the Victoria Secret Fashion show, but has decided to ruin all her appeal and hard work by dating A$AP Rocky.  Another meeting I’d like to be a fly on the wall for is the one where they all discussed how they could top each other for “Least Appealing BF”.  How Kanye became appealing, I know I don’t know. Sorry, Kim.

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Khloe then gave us her American Jeans which actually are kind of a big deal, but it’s still not what I want from my Kardashians.  Honestly, the only Kardashian who can make me happy right now is Kourtney if she pops out another one of her adorable babies.  That would make my day, but it seems she doesn’t care about me and my feelings.
And then, the worst of the worst and what we all feared the longer Kim stayed underground…the return of T. Swift.  Our hero, Kimberly, saved us back in the Spring by finally showing Taylor’s true colors aka a lying snake and Taylor disappeared from the social scene for a while.  But once Kim went under ground (understandably) we knew that the snake would feel safe once again.  Then when Kanye went down, Taylor found her moment and reappeared with what I think is the same song she’s released 12 times!

So seeing Kimberly, flaunting her stuff in a campaign she probably agreed to months ago gave me hope for the end of 2016.  I know it wasn’t our usual Kim sightings, but she looked flawless and it was a weird video about the Northern Lights and I loved every minute of it.

Kim, I hope you see how much you are missed.  You are the only sister with any true talent and, for my own sanity, I beg you to return just so I can get back to my normal life and stop watching 5 hours worth of Kylie snap chats a day, just for a glimpse of North.


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